How We Found Out

I am a fan of stories. Long stories. Stories with too many details that put you exactly in the shoes of the person telling the story. I love hearing them. I love telling them. Don't be surprised when I tell you the reader's digest version of your story really isn't cutting it for me.

So for those of you passionate about stories with too many details. I have a story for you. How we found out I was pregnant.

Like clockwork my period came. It should have. It always started light and after four days it would kick into high gear. I had the pattern memorized at this point. I had taken many a pregnancy test convincing myself that my "light period" was implantation bleeding. The tests were always negative and I wound up doing a lot of laundry. It happened more than I care to admit. A heartbreaking roller coaster that I loathed and yet could not get off the ride. This time things were different. I held no hope and moved forward with my life. Taking the necessary steps to prevent unneeded days spent in my laundry room. I was holding no hope. We had a fertility specialist appointment scheduled less than two weeks down the road. I thought about which tests would be done, constantly thinking how the doctors could probably care less about my timeline and the tests alone could take months. Oh well. I moved forward.

My Mom came in town that weekend. She was having surgery for a deviated septum and with my Dad at work she figured the best in home care would be in Texas. Stacey and I were willing to be her nurses for the ordeal. On Sunday Aaron and I drove to my sister's house for a family dinner. After good food, good conversation, and a football game, Aaron kissed me goodnight and headed home. I was spending the night at Stacey's to help get Carly to school and watch Taylor while Stacey took my Mom to the hospital. During the hustle and bustle of the nighttime routine I went to the bathroom where I made a shocking discovery. My period had stopped dead in its tracks. Three days in and suddenly nothing. I was confused and thought to myself, "There is no way. We didn't even try this month. No methods to improve our chances. Nothing. There is absolutely no way."

A few weeks back Stacey mentioned to me that she had a spare pregnancy test should I ever want to use it. I was convinced I was not pregnant and wanted instant confirmation that was the case before I rode the hope roller coaster all over again. I explained my situation and after a brief ransacking of a few bathroom drawers we couldn't find the test. Part of me was relieved. I didn't want to relive the disappointment that always followed test taking. I knew I wasn't pregnant. I didn't need a test telling me  too. Normally a situation like that would drive me mentally insane, but I was calm and confident that I knew what was happening. My body did funny stuff all the time, why would this be different. I texted Aaron and asked for his advice, he wrote back, "I would wait a week or so before you take a test. Give your body some time, it always does weird stuff." I wrote back, "Good call. You're probably right."

The next morning proceeded as scheduled. I got Carly to school and the little ones fed and entertained.

I didn't feel very well, but I chalked it up to the fact that I don't sleep well in different places. In the afternoon Stacey brought my Mom home. Drugged, dry mouth, sore nose. My heart went out for her, she didn't look comfortable in the slightest.

The little ones flocked to her and offered the best comfort they could think of. Foot massages. I'm sure Grace really had no idea what she was doing.

We made sure she was comfortable and we sat on the couch talking. In our conversation it came up that my Mom probably needed a slurpee to help with her dry throat. At one point we were quiet and my sister whispered, "Did your period come back?" for fear that my whispering would lead to questions I wrote a response back on my phone. "No." Stacey whispered, "Do you want me to go get you a pregnancy test. " I wrote back, "No. I'm scared. I don't know if I want to take one." I don't know how much time went by before I stood up and said, "Mom I'm going to go grab you a slurpee, what flavor do you want?" It was my cover to buy a pregnancy test.

My heart pounded nervously. "Why am I doing this? I'm just going to feel stupid again." My mind was in a million places yet I was oddly calm. I felt a spiritual feeling, one I equated to feeling when I was about to get bad news, and my heart sank. Heavenly Father was trying to protect me before my heart broke again, I just knew it. But I kept driving. I quick stop in Walmart. Then a quick drive to RaceTrace for a slurpee and I was on my way home. After giving my Mom her much needed cold beverage I snuck upstairs to take the test. My heart pounded so hard I could barely see. I sat with my back to the sink texting a friend about a play date we were planning for our girls. I tried desperately for 3 minutes to pretend that everything was normal. And then my timer went off.

I stood up.

The constant mental battle of "What if its positive? and What if it's negative?" played a million times in those few seconds. How would I react? How would I handle it? What would I do? I had thought millions of times how it would feel once it was positive.

I turned around.

I was scared to look down but dying to see it all at the same time and I looked. There they were. Two pink lines intersecting. Lines I had never seen before. I knew right away it was positive. I had taken enough tests to know what negative meant and this was the first test that even came close to being positive. I was shocked. Oh my gosh. oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh. It's positive. I stared at that pink plus sign with my jaw touching the floor. There is no way. I laughed and tears welled up my eyes. I had to tell Aaron.

With Grace sleeping just down the hall I snuck into my niece's room. My hands shook as I dialed his number. I kept my voice down trying keep the news a secret from the other members in the house. Aaron, "Hello?" I could hear his co-workers in the background and I could tell that he was trying to keep his voice down as well. I said, "Hey babe, remember that advice you gave me about not taking another pregnancy test for a week or so?" "Yeah?" "Well I didn't follow that advice and I just took a test and it was positive!!"Aaron, "Are you serious? That is awesome." I could tell he was desperately trying to control his voice as to not lead his coworkers to believe that something exciting was going on when it totally was. Then he said "I've never been so glad that you didn't heed my advice."

We texted shortly thereafter where we could be more cavalier with our excitement. He texted "This is so exciting." Followed by about 27 exclamation marks. I couldn't stop myself from smiling. With my newly learned secret I made my way downstairs. While putting things away in the kitchen Stacey met my eyes and mouthed "So?" I couldn't help but smile and I motioned upstairs where I showed her the test. We did our best to keep our voices a whisper. There were screams and "Oh my goshs" and Stacey hugged and congratulated me. Apparently we failed at keeping our excited whispering to an unhearable level. My niece shouted from downstairs, "What are you guys whispering about? We can hear you whispering up there." I suddenly realized that my new secret wasn't going to stay a secret for long. I tucked the test away in my pocket and casually made my way downstairs. After busying myself for a few minutes I walked over to the couch where my Mom was sitting. I said, "If we could get you a gift, any gift at all, to make you feel better what would it be?" I tried to play it off like Stacey and I were going to surprise her with a get well soon gift of some sort. My mom paused and thought for a moment, then she looked at me and said, "For you to be pregnant." I started to cry as I pulled the test out of my pocket and handed it to her. We hugged and talked and estimated when my due date would be.

Later in the day I took two more tests, just to be extra sure.

I sent it to Aaron and said "Definitely pregnant."

Later that day we called and texted our immediate family members the wonderful and unexpected news.

And that is how our story began.